And now your moment of Zen

My time in the Marina has been really interesting for me. I thought I knew what to expect walking in: rich, white, snobby, people who were terrified of the rest of the city. Turns out, I was mostly right.

There are, of course, really great, kind, worldly folks to be met, but I found them to be the exception. I was shocked at how difficult I found it to get Marina residents to talk to me. I’m not exactly the world’s most intimidating guy (not one despot has ever had dimples), but I had such a hard time cracking people’s shells. I would constantly get that look of “Oh God, he wants to talk to me. Look straight ahead. Speed up those steps. Clench your jaw. Look intimidating. Is he still coming? Crap! O.K. eyes down, march forward. Ignore his kind hello. I would run if it were socially acceptable. Round the corner. He’s gone, crisis averted. I can rela…oooooo Jamba Juice.”

This difficulty taught me a lot about myself and who I want to be as a reporter. I said in class I wish I had selected a neighborhood that would have forced me outside of my comfort zone. That remains absolutely true. The process of writing these stories was challenging to me mentally, but it didn't affect my world view they way other neighborhood would have.

When I look at the collective works I’ve put together for this class, I’m a little bummed that there isn’t much of any substance there. I am very proud of the stories I put together and the work I put into them, but the subject matter is a bit fluffy for my taste. The Marina didn’t really present any opportunities, more accurately I didn’t find any opportunities, for stories that covered really important issues.

There were days where I’d envy Nina’s selection of the Tenderloin. Yes her stories must have been exponentially harder to put together, but the end product is something that really matters.

As journalism becomes muddled in the world of blogs and special interest, more writers get washed into the world of entertainment, style and life publications. Every day a smaller percentage of the journalism being made really, truly matters.

I want my work to matter. I want to matter.